At the end of May, I will be leaving Jonathan’s Voice and entering into a new phase of my life. Retirement. It’s nothing to do with Jonathan’s Voice. I have loved every moment of working for them. I have met some fabulous people, learned so much, had a lot of fun and working with Val and Graham has been an honour. No, it’s entirely about me and how something inside me has shifted and I feel ready to stop work, in a way I haven’t felt before. Especially working in the field of mental health. I haven’t thought too much about what I will be doing instead – I have decided to give myself the summer off – so will cross that bridge when I come to it. Which is scarily soon now. I have even given myself the get-out clause that if something else interesting comes up I will consider it.
However, although I feel very ready to move into this next stage, it is not without some apprehension. Will I get bored or lonely? Will my life start to lack purpose? Will my brain shrivel up without the stimuli I get from work? There is also a lot of letting go and although that is exciting on the one hand, it feels very hard on the other. For example, my British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy accreditation and registration is due for renewal in June. Do I let that go? But that means letting go of a huge part of my identity. It was so hard won and has been a major defining aspect of who I am both professionally and personally for about 35 years. The big question is, although I feel ready to stop work now, am I completely ready to let go of that; to close the door on a profession that I have loved, evolved in and developed a high level of expertise and experience in? I am very fortunate that for most of my working life as a counsellor, head of service and more latterly, a trainer and consultant, I have felt happy, valued and stimulated. I have also been extremely privileged in having met so many wonderful people in the therapeutic space and maybe touched their lives in a meaningful way.
So, the whole issue of retirement is for me, and others, I suspect, a knotty one. On the one hand I am really excited by it but on the other hand I am terrified of only being surrounded by people of my age (other retirees) or very young ones. In some weird way there is a kind of circulatory in my adult life, ending up where I started, looking after small children.
Do I have any tips on how to navigate this? No, you will have to ask me in a years’ time. But what I can say is that it is important not to fall into the trap of defining yourself entirely by your work and make time for outside interests and hobbies. Do not neglect relationships or use work as a way of avoiding working at them or engaging in other activities. That is an easy trap to fall into especially when work is legitimately very demanding and time-consuming. Working like this can also become quite compulsive, if we are not careful, and we might feel lost if we are not very stressed, busy and striving. In the UK, we are not as good at protecting our non-working lives as some other European countries and all this might make stopping work harder to do.
I am determined not to carry on working for the wrong reasons and recognise that now is the right time for me to move over and let someone new in. Someone younger, keener and with more up-to-date skills and knowledge to take Jonathan’s Voice forward in exciting new directions.
